Accentuate the Positive, 3.0

If nominated, I will not run… but I will absorb the free publicity that comes with it.

Master media manipulator Donald Trump has done it again.

ALBANY, N.Y. (AP) — Donald Trump is considering running for governor, a leading Republican said Friday. Senate Majority Leader Joseph Bruno on Thursday suggested that a big-name candidate could be flirting with entering the 2006 contest. On Friday, he confirmed to News Channel 10 in Albany that he had been referring to Trump.

This sounds like the sort of trial balloon that a proto-candidate would float. Not that anyone could ever prove that he did such a thing overtly.

No matter… within a period of two-and-a-half hours, the entire thing was blissfully reversed.

ALBANY, N.Y. (AP) — The Donald does not want to be the governor.

Donald Trump, mega-developer and star of NBC’s “The Apprentice,” said he has no interest in running for governor of New York this year.

“I’m not going to run for governor because I’m having too much fun doing what I’m doing now,” Trump told the New York Post.

Trump — who also told the New York Daily News that “I have no interest in running for public office at this time” — didn’t immediately respond to a telephone message left Tuesday at his New York City office by The Associated Press.

If Donald does end up running, it will only be after being dragged kicking and screaming by the “good people of New York” who have “begged” and “pleaded” with him to “sacrifice himself” for the “sake of the Empire State.”

(That way he doesn’t have to spend only his own money on the campaign.)

While we’re at it, I do have one question… Why is the second photo darker than the first photo? Shades of O.J.?

I never did trust that little Elmo. Now I’ve got a reason.

A little background: my little girl just had to have an Elmo-themed birthday when she turned two. My wife made a lovely Elmo-cake, and we avoided Extreme Elmo saturation by going with the simple plates, napkins, and hats.

Being the dutiful parents, we took waaaaaaay too many pictures of the party, and only then discovered the evil that was lurking above the scalps of the innocent: Once you got a little elevation, you could clearly see the not-so-subliminal message from Elmo: Elmo wants you to die.

So, this really comes as no surprise to me: Toddler’s Talking Elmo Book Asks ‘Who Wants To Die?’

Family members said 16-month-old Miranda Boll’s new book, “Potty Time With Elmo,” was supposed to teach an interactive lesson using voice commands.

However, when the book’s buttons are pressed, it reportedly says something it is not supposed to — “who wants to die?”

Yikes!

Apparently, this thing has been floating around like a ticking media time bomb for awhile — one guy just sold his “collector’s item” on eBay. At some point, you’d think the publisher would have done something a little proactive, but no. Not a mention anywhere on the site for parents who might be inquiring about this. (Then again, I did have to search them out — it’s not like the media is even spreading their name around.)

Maybe Elmo’s outer fur is laced with some type of space-age spray-on Teflon polymer. He seems to slide right by, past the suspicions of unwitting parents across the world. I’m just glad that I have seen the light, and prevented the Little Red Menace’s nefarious mind-control powers from overwhelming my impressionable young son. My boy is at such a tender age, and I am so fortunate he is free from the evil. Here’s a picture of my boy…